Before becoming a speaker and author, I’m not sure I really understood what an act of courage it is to share what you create. Public speaking is gravely feared, and it makes good sense! When we stand up in front of people and verbalize what’s on our hearts and minds (hoping it might be useful to others), we make ourselves vulnerable. We don’t know how our messages will actually be received. When an author publishes something, it feels even more permanent and up for scrutiny.
As I send off my new “work of heart” out into the world, it isn’t without trepidation. I thought long and hard about what topics to include and how to cover them. I went through rounds of editing, reorganizing, finessing, and polishing. And yet, I know my words won’t reach everyone in the same way. I know my voice won’t necessarily resonate with every reader. As an average human equipped with an ego, this is a natural reaction…and it’s challenging.
And still, I chose/choose to go ahead regardless. I summon courage and brace myself because it’s a worthy effort. I believe that if the stories, approaches, and explanations I have penned can help even just one person find more confidence or comfort, it will be enough. All the effort, time, and risk of judgment will be worth it.
This week, pre-ordered books began reaching readers. It’s an absolutely thrilling time of anticipation. I LOVE seeing it in people’s hands. But I do find myself quietly holding my breath ever so slightly as I await feedback. As described in the book, this is a type of “liminal space,” i.e., the time “in-between” that can feel suspended and complex to work through.
And then, a kind person took a few moments to send me a quick note. She wrote, “Francesca, I have just read (and taken notes on) the first 20 pages of your book and I am gobsmacked! Not only is the content intriguing, inspiring and informative but your writing is so impressive, such a comfortable flow. Thank you so much. On to the next page!” –Ellen Luby, M.A. Gerontologist (shared with permission).
I was so moved and heartened. I exhaled. It’s worth it, I repeated. It’s all worth it.
This journey will have its ups and downs, and unexpected twists and turns. But that’s the richness. That’s the stuff. I’m going to do my best to lean into it and learn from it all.
Here’s to connection.
Here’s to being brave.
Here’s to being mission-driven versus fear-ridden.
#deathjournaling
Francesca Lynn Arnoldy 