Children are naturally curious. Sometimes they ask BIG questions. I did. When I was 6 or 7, I asked my grandmother if she was going to die. Just like that. Clear out of the blue. She told me she would (“someday”) and that she wasn't afraid. She had "lived a good life." This clearly left… Continue reading Tips for Talking with Kids about Loss
Recently, I supported friends through the heartbreak of goodbye. They had imagined a full life together, and now this vision was being swiftly revoked, before their youngest would even start kindergarten. I visited and together we worked on drafting legacy letters. One of this friend’s deepest fears was his children not remembering him. As his… Continue reading Finding What Resonates: Trial and Error in Doula Work
As doulas, we enter into our clients’ end-of-life and grief journeys as our(whole)selves. This includes not only kindness and patience, but also our conditioning and shadows as well. We are not empty vessels. We carry hushed reminders of past trauma, unhealed wounds, and unrecognized assumptions. We are not void of dynamic humanness—thankfully so. In truth,… Continue reading Whole Selves and Shadow Sides: A Balanced Doula
In memory of Nancy Hays Gurney, Jan 4, 1956 – May 3, 2005 Forever 49. Frozen in time. It has been too many years since the world has seen your smile. Since I’ve felt your hug squeeze the breath out of me, your soft raspberry bathrobe against my cheek. Since I’ve heard you use my… Continue reading On Knowing Enough
Grief is our natural response to a meaningful loss. Some losses are heavier than others, yet they are all valid and real. It might be a change in daily activities, losing a role we have held, transitioning to an empty nest, divorce, retirement, or a death (among others). Healthy grieving can be quite intense, especially… Continue reading Weathering the STORM of Grief
Francesca Lynn Arnoldy 